The Person with Concerns about their Sexual Compulsivity

What is Compulsive Sexual Behavior Disorder/Sexual Addiction?

There may be many reasons you are here.
You may know that you have a problem. You may be wondering if your behavior really is out of control. Someone may have asked you to get help.

You may also be experiencing overwhelming emotions and confusion as to what steps you need to take next?

Perhaps you have been “discovered” and you are feeling waves of guilt and shame. You may feel deeply alone and isolated. You may be depressed, anxious, or frustrated with what your life has become.

These emotions will begin to level off once you get the help you need. Our program begins with a personal assessment session with a therapist trained in sexual addiction recovery. Call us now at (916) 728-5433, you can find peace and healing in your life and in your relationship.

Do I have a problem?

Try to determine if you need help. Review this list to see if anything here seems to apply to you.

  • Having sexual sites bookmarked
  • Joining sexual sites to gain access to online sexual material
  • Searching for sexual material through an Internet search tool
  • Spending money for online sexual material
  • Participating in sexually related chats
  • Using sexualized usernames or nicknames on the Internet
  • Masturbating while viewing sexual material
  • Accessing sexual sites from multiple computers
  • Spending time planning when you can view sexual material
  • Taking increased risks online (e.g., giving out your name, meeting people offline, etc.)
  • “Sexting”
  • Experiencing significant physiological changes acting out (e.g., increase in heart rate, sweaty palms, etc.)
  • Viewing more pornography, for longer periods of time, or seeking more hard-core pornography to get the same level of excitement as at first
  • Spending inordinate amounts of time obtaining sexual material
  • Having online sexual affairs or encounters
  • Engaging in online fantasy that would be illegal if carried out
  • Acting out in various ways (e.g., strip clubs, prostitution services, escort services, massage parlors, affairs, exhibitionism, voyeurism, etc.)

How Big Is My Problem?

One sign of a serious addiction is when you continue the behavior despite negative consequences.  Review this list to see if any thing here seems to apply to you.

  • Neglecting social, occupational, or recreational activities to view pornography or act out sexually
  • Continuing the behavior despite it having hurt people you care about
  • Continuing the behavior despite it having caused significant problems In my primary relationships
  • Continuing the behavior despite it having put my job at risk
  • Continuing the behavior in spite of family and friends expressing concern about my behavior

Am I Emotionally Compromised?

Another sign of a serious addiction is how it effects your emotional health. Sometimes you may be aware of your feelings. Sometimes your feelings may be so painful that your brain blocks them from conscious awareness. Review this list to see if any thing here seems to apply to you.

  • Hiding the behavior from others
  • Using pornography or acting out as a reward
  • Using pornography or acting out as an escape
  • Defensiveness when challenged about the behavior
  • Justification for the behavior
  • Blaming others for my behavior
  • Anger when someone discusses my behavior
  • Avoidance of conversations or people that may expose my behavior

Am I Trapped In an Addiction?

Finally, when you try to stop the behavior but just can’t no matter how hard you try, you are under the power of an addictive process from which there is no escape without help. Review this list to see if any thing here seems to apply to you.

  • Wanting to stop your sexual behaviors but feeling unable to stop
  • After stopping the behavior the desire gets stronger and stronger
  • Getting on the Internet for one reason but end up viewing pornography
  • Promising yourself or others that “this is the last time” yet continuing to engage in the sexual behavior
  • Repeated attempts stop result in repeated failures to stop

Please know that although the compulsive sexual behaviors at work in your life have become problematic that you can take a right course of action to restore your life and your relationship. It is your responsibility to get professional help to determine how serious the problem is and to do something about it. You are not alone. We are here to help guide you through that process.

Call (916) 728-5433 or email info@lifestarsacramento.org to get started today.